My canvas dangling on the wall, canvas with faded colors, canvas with spot and stain scattered everywhere. The picture that was once beautiful and complete, was now just a heap of but and if. I didn't know if I should throw it away, or pick my paintbrush and try to recreate. Those spots and stain asunder my heart, and I didn't know where to start. Spots and and stain engraved itself in my eyes, and I stared at it for a long time, with my empty eyes. My fingers remained thawed and entangled, and seasons changed from summer to winter, and one day I faded away like the colors on my canvas, with words dangling on my lips , "I too was once complete, but I ruined myself into a heap of but and if" .